Just wondering if anyone can offer some relationship advice regarding being in a long term relationship with someone completing a PhD.
I met my boyfriend 3 years ago, and he is in the 9th year of his dissertation (aiming to submit in the fall/winter and hoping to defend in the spring/summer of 2017). When we first met, I was finishing up doctoral school and writing my board exams, so I absolutely can relate to living life on a student budget, late nights studying, reading & writing etc. 3 years into our relationship, we are still both living separately in Toronto, and I've recently found a full time job working at a clinic. My boyfriend is 36 and still lives at home with his parents, who pay for everything in terms of tuition, living expenses, groceries, car expenses, etc.
He's told me in the past that he is open to the idea of pursuing industry work should the academia route not work out, and I have told him that if need be, I am willing to relocate myself and my dog, to anywhere in North America since my doctor's license permits me to work in Canada and the US. Yesterday, he told me he wants to apply for a postdoc that would require him to be 1-2 years overseas. I understand that it's still early and he would be competing with other applicants, but the thought of this putting a strain on our relationship weighs heavily on me. He is suggesting that I live with him during the postdoc (which sounds great), but realistically, it is a huge distance, and the job prospects for my line of work are rare to come by. We have discussed our future together in terms of marriage, owning a home, and kids being something to work towards, but I'm almost 31 and I'd like to get the proverbial ball rolling.
Can anyone relate to this? How did you two make it work? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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