hi guys, do you think it's better to be single (no relationship) during your PhD, to enable you to focus? are relationships too distracting? is one supposed to let their early 20s pass them by? you're only young once..just a thought. waiting for your words of wisdom.

It's always nice to relax with friends and take your mind off work!! It's helped me through my PhD.

I am married and I don't think I could cope with things half as well without my husband. You shouldn't give up your life to do a PhD otherwise you might end up resenting it. You only live once! so enjoy it.

I find that most PhD students seem to be single. Bitter.... but single.

thanks Ana, but marriage is different. there are guarantees there that do not exist in relationships. for instance loyalty & emotional support.. the point is, with relationships you are stuck there worrying about someone else, time which would have been well spent brainstorming and come up with those original ideas. don't you think that it's better to be bitter and single and successful finish your PhD than to be 'happy' and hitched & take the risk of regretting it someday if things don't work out- the relationship & the phd.

all the replies seem to be saying that relationships don't do any harm, they help you manage and supposedly keep you happy. does anyone think have different experiences? would like to hear both sides of the story guys. Eric, why are most PhD students bitter? Hans- ya i agree, platonic friends are important. how about other friends? More women's opinions pliz, guys always seem to be better at handling this stuff. what do the girls think.

I've been with my partner for 6 years and we now live together and have just finished renovating our house. I think you need someone at home that you can whinge at when you've had a bad day, but who also knows that it's not their fault. They need to be supportive, but not want all your time so that you can do those extra hours that you need to do. I've been lucky in that sense.

I'm looking for a PhD and I haven't been able to find any near where i live. I have been with my boyf for 7 years and I am reluctant to leave him behind. On the other hand I know I have to if I want to do a PhD. I do think it would be easier if I was single.

It's great to be ambitious and to give 100% to your research but don't forget to live a little as well! Certainly helps to have a caring partner to come home to after a hard day in the lab when nothing has worked (again!).

ya, i hear what ur saying H. I recently made that decision to leave my boyfriend- not to say that you should- i didn't see how having him around was helping. he wouldn't be supportive as he we always whining.. couldn't sustain an intellectual conversation either. am very passionate about my work & wouldn't mind the company of someone with whom i would be able to discuss it & get an opinion :) crude i know, telling some1, "if am gonna achieve my dreams it's not gonna be with you!" lol :)have no regrets tho.

mmhm, nice to hear stories like Neil's and Ann's. such people really exist? seems people are happier with someone and their PhD, than they are with their pillows to go back to and their PhD. very enlightening. ok guys, perhaps joining the PhD singles club isn't such a great idea. might regret it when am 70! lol. i should be more open minded i suppose. thanks guys.

Live life to the max! - work hard, play hard. Enjoy your PhD and love life, one helps the other.

Well, sweetchic. You may have come up with a good idea - PhD singles matching scheme. Finding the ONE - masculine, intellectual and caring. This could save you time looking for love and keep your focus on the PhD!

I'm lucky really sweet chic as my bf did the same degree as me so i can chat to him bout the subject. I would not give him up in order to advance my career but then he is very supportive. I just find the whole idea of being apart for 3 years scary. So I dunno what I will do!

For H: have you tried asking him really nicely to come with you? ya, you're really lucky to have the same interests. don't let go of that... such people aint easy to come by trust me.