Just wondering if anyone has advice. I had a good run of My Phd for the first two and half years with the usual ups and downs of course , Half way through my third year, I became extremely exhausted and suffered from depression and anxiety. Some for my own reasons and alot to do with feeling completly isolated and upsupported within a department. I ended up deferring , moving country and getting a job which has helped enormously. however im now deciding wether to go back and finish ...Ive had little contact with the department since, and feel my supervisor has essentially lost interest. Has anyone else been in a similar situation ie deferring and tried to go back and try to finish and was it worth it?! Or has anyone just moved on and put their energy into something else. I also face Uni fees and family obligations too!
Hello Cara:
I was/am in same boat.
Departed my phd program, started another masters program, and do still consider going back at some point.
Then I try to reflect upon the fact that we tend to look back on things with rose coloured glasses at times and
to forgot the painful reasons we might have made a decision and this really puts me in check.
I am not saying I won't go back, just that it would take a heck of a good reason for me to do so after finally pulling myself
out of that very isolating and painful experience, and having a much better life as a result. I guess I would just suggest that you should have a very very good reason to do it, and make sure it is not just to prove something or to overcome some self inflicted shame as a result of not finishing. Remember, that time is sunk costs and you only have power over today. And, if you do or do not go back it will not mean a damn to anybody else--that is the humbling but freeing reality is that ultimately people may talk briefly but nobody really cares--so do it, or don't do it, for yourself.
You comment you've a job and also family commitments. You supervisory team seems to have lost interest. You were exhasted and depressed then and (I assume) happy now. It seems to me you've answered your own question.
Deciding whether or not to go back depends on what direction you want your life to take. If you want an academic future, then talk to your department to see if it's worth going back. Otherwise, it might be better just to move on rather than put yourself back in a position where you were miserable.
However, the decision is yours at the end of the day.
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