======= Date Modified 20 Sep 2011 10:05:45 =======
I sent my supervisor my 3rd draft this morning, we had verbally agreed that I will submit on/before 30 Sept. He has just replied promising to revert to me within max a week but also asks when is the last date I can submit without incurring additional fees. This is actually the end of Oct. However (and this is one of those desparate posts) I genuinely don't think I can emotionally take any more. Neither, I don't think, can my family. Apparently my mother and hubby are in phone contact about me lately! If I don't submit by end of September I don't know what I will do. Any advice how to tell my supervisor this? It's a long time since I bawled out loud as I did when I read his email.


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Hi, I feel for you (stressful situation), but perhaps your sup was just checking that if you got the draft back in a week you would have time to make any needed amendments before your deadline to submit?

If you can make any changes suggested by your supervisor in the time between hearing back and the end of Sept surely you could still submit then :-)

I would say try not to stress too much, take this week to relax and recharge your batteries, and still aim to finish and submit ASAP. I am a long way off from where you are though - not looking forward to the inevitable pressure/stress.

Hope all goes well, have a pie (mince) ;-)

I'm sending you a PM Ady

I know exactly how you feel I feel at the end of my tether with the changes, and I've also had the 'fees' convo with my sup this week. - wasn't helped by the HoD saying I could have a waiver for a few weeks - which means there's a lack of urgency (although is a weight lifted too). I'm a bit better off in that i have a starting new job deadline, but I wouldn't be surprised if sup ignores this completey.

Not sure what to advise, maybe just say the printing office need it for 2 weeks before submission? (good excuse if he doesn't understand techology like my sup!)

Thanks Sneaks, Delta and Caterpillar.

I am going to grasp the nettle and tell him, yes tell him that its September or nothing. I am also going to ignore the question about latest submission date!!!! Not very mature I know but needs must.

I did click the helpful user button but it seems I have voted for you all in the past! So a virtual pressie each

(gift)(gift)(gift)

Hey Ady- I would just tell him you're submitting it this month and that is that (or find a suitable/possible fictionary reason for why you can't wait until next month). You could keep on fiddling with it for another 6 months, but you really have to call it a day at some point and let it go, and I can totally imagine that you have psyched yourself up for getting it in this month and would be gutted if it was put back. You have to protect your own sanity, and so long as you're happy with the quality of your thesis then just hand it in! Good luck with it, KB

Thanks KB - tbh while I may tweak here and there, that's what I'm doing at the moment - tweaking - and so I don't see that there will be a whole lot of difference between now and then, except for my sanity! So yes, I emailed him and told him - here's hoping...

Good for you! I don't have that prob as sups are more eager than me but I'd probably have done the same. I hope you get it sorted! ps. has he replied yet or was it not an 'open to comments' email?

Good on you Ady! Hope his reply is favourable, and good luck for your submission! Best, KB

======= Date Modified 20 Sep 2011 09:36:11 =======
Dear Ady,

First of all, congratulations on getting to the third draft! It means you are quite close to the goal though I realize simply waiting up on submission can be extremely painful. I have been in this situation more than once when I had to convince my sup. Basically if it were like my sup then he probably does not have time to read (maybe) and wants to ensure that it is fine (while not realizing the traumatic effects this delay is having on yourself). One possible way of convincing him is maybe to ask for a (long) meeting. Bring in the draft, maybe even make a small presentation (In other words, go prepared). If you can find out his exact concerns and address them in the meeting, maybe he will be convinced.  Also, please tell him clearly how much this submission matters to you and that you are unable to face the pressure anymore. I have done this more than once in the last period of my PhD (even though initially I would simply comply) and simply had to discuss with my supervisor that I could not take it anymore. It took a bit of convincing but at the end, it worked as it appeared that he had not looked at it earlier from my point of view.

Best of luck in submission and all.

Thanks Dr. Mak :-), that's good advice. Maybe to be fair to him he doesn't quite get how stressed I am as I do tend to internalise it and put my brave face on when I meet him. Thanks Skig as well - I have asked for a meeting htis week, waiting on a reply...

I'll keep you informed

Really appreciate the advice all :-)

Hi Ady

Sounds to me like it's time to just give it in. I think most PhD thesii reach a point where ok, you can keep changeing and maybe slightly improving things, but actually not make a whole load of difference. I got to this stage, my fussy supervisor wanted to read more of it, I gave it in. I think when to hand in should be your decision anyways. I think most people when they hand in feel to an extent as if they are cutting their losses- they could make it better, but for a document that size, perfection is very hard to achieve, you may get a few more minors, that's likely to be the worst that could happen though.

My advice is to go with your original deadline, ignore your supervisor on this, these people can be quite insensitive.

======= Date Modified 20 Sep 2011 11:01:58 =======
Thanks Cakeman, that's it exactly(up). Seems I got you your third star so at least I can do something right ;-)

Edit: have meeting with supv Thursday pm; now have to psych myself up for it!

Thanks Ady

I'm sure you can do many things right really, it's just that you are stressed and probably tired.

Let us know how you get on, and remember it's ultimately your project and your decision, be firm.

Hi Ady, sorry to see you are having problems with finalising your thesis. I can imagine your frustrations at this stage. It is best to let your sup know how this is affecting you and your need to stick to the sept deadline. If the comments are just little tweaks here and there it is really at a stage for submission. As said previously, there is so much tweaking and procrastinating that can be done to what is never a complete work. Time to submit I would say. Also, I submitted without approval from one of my sups (he didn't get round to reading it!) so can be done.

Good luck for your meeting tomorrow!