======= Date Modified 04 Nov 2011 23:09:08 =======
Shanshuprophecy...thanks for your words, much appreciated. Understanding a little of her PhD journey is important to me, not so I can intrude on it in any way (she has told me how people claim 'credit' in some circumstances about their role in their partners work) but so I can understand some of the stresses she faces

I think at times I may not explain myself to her as well as I can and try too hard to normalise events ...letting her vent isn't personally aimed at me I know and your advice is welcome

And I love hearing her talk about her research, the passion she has for it and the meaning to her...she remains the most amazing woman I have met, the challenges she has overcome and the future she plans for her and her children's benefit

Hello all..I have been dating a wonderful lady for the last 5 months who is in the throes of completing her PhD, she has submitted her dissertation and is now reviewing it ahead of her Viva. This is an entirely new world to me and I have come to realise how much it can dominate her life and that is a new facet to our relationship I have not been exposed to much before. She has 3 teenage children, works full time and runs her household along with the PhD study.....this is something she has undertaken against many adverse impacts and she is passionate about it and it  is something she has achieved and she, frankly, is an amazing lady whom I am lucky to have in my life.
But...I don't have any experience of what she has gone through and whilst we talk about it, and I try to take everything on board as to how the current process will change the day to day mechanics of our relationship, i wondered how other partners of PhD students have found the experience??
I am trying to adjust my lifestyle to give her the space she needs to focus on what she needs to do (we don't live together so this helps to a degree) and am more than happy to do this as I know how much this means to her as it has been a hard road and her achievement leaves me in equal parts awe struck, full of love and affection for her but also a little on the outside looking in (maybe because I came along so late in the process)
Our relationship is strong and secure and I have no problem doing anything I can to ease the final few months...is this the right thing? Have other partners felt similar??
In summary...an awesome, amazing, wonderful lady who has achieved so much, and i am fortunate to have in my life, and i would just like to comprehend as best I can the journey she has had over the years.