Hi Geisha
I don't come on here very often, but when I read your thread it was bizarrely similar to my own situation, so had to reply. I also had this situation develop with my male supervisor, although I'm not sure anything was ever requited and it wasn't all in my head! I am (apart from this horrid evil obsession) happily married to a wonderful guy who has given me so much support and understanding throughout my Phd, so I found these feelings really unbearable, and eventually ended up going to see a counsellor to try and understand why I was feeling like this, especially when the supervisor in question wasn't even that hot!! (He is a really nice guy).
I just want to reassure you that a) this is probably perfectly normal and happens alot - as someone else mentioned it is perhaps related to the power factor as in the end much of your PhD success or not will depend on your supervisors guidance and support. I established that I adore my female supervisor just as much as my male sup, but I never mistook these feelings for a crush as I'm not that way inclined!! It can be strange sometimes trying to work out male/female relationships I think, and when you get on really well with a member of the opposite sex you can freak yourself out that you have feelings which aren't really founded on anything.
b) Nobody knows for sure what your feelings are/were unless you have told them. He could read what he liked into your acting out as you put it, but he will only be making assumptions, so really, just do not stress about the shamefulness (I know just how it feels, I am always wondering whether I gave anything away, but I figure that I am just a friendly person, so people can take it whichever way they like, its not my problem).
c) You need to finish your PhD - as you say you have had so much turmoil - well I say make it count girl! Otherwise you will have put yourself through all this cr*p for nothing...... And you will probably be amazed that once you have attained the halo'd doctor status, you will probably wonder what this was all about!! (I'm hoping that for me, once I've finished the power relationship thing will evolve into something much more balanced.
Hope this helps you, as I know that I have really suffered because of this, and had I not gone to see somebody, I think I may have gone insane, messed up my marriage, PhD and life in general.
All the best! J