I wrote a few threads on not being able to find a job.

Well, on third interview I got it. I moved cities and have now worked there for a month. It is a consulting/research position at a research institute and they call it post doc but it's something in between. I am part of a large epidemiological study.

So after a month of working there and consulting others on their projects, I was told that it's about time I started my own "research program"? I guess I am supposed to lead a project that I think of. Except....I have zero ideas, the study is still largely unfamiliar (because of the short time of being there). They are putting more and more pressure on me to think of something and I feel completely blocked. I have many doubts, that I am not cut out for academia or being a post doc.

I share an office with someone that is a database manager for our study. He earns about the same as me and I find myself envying him. He has no pressure to invent anything, he writes some code, gets the data other people want and his job ends there. Doing something like that would be a breeze for me. Instead, I am stuck with this academic role where I feel that I am soon going to run out of time, unable to find an idea and get fired.

I am also left to my own devices, with no help or input from anyone but I guess that's what being independent researcher is all about. I am just failing miserably.

I just....need some advice. I would be happy to be a part of collaborative research team but I don't think I am cut out to lead any projects sadly :(

I had all kinds of issues during my PhD. From personal to supervisory. I was also on the verge of quitting more times that I can count. I even took a leave of absence for 3 months, trying to ease my way into quitting with minimum drama. I ended up changing my mind and tried to stick it out (little did I know that things were going to get even worse).

My only supervisor started avoiding my emails and meetings. At one point, I went 6 months without a meeting, a single email or anything to even know that I am on the right track. I lost all motivation but stumbled my way through. I was also used as dumping ground for other academics; from admin work to marking 200 exam papers without pay etc etc.

Finally I had enough and I went to see the head of my department to ask for advice. I told him everything in a calm and logical manner. I was careful not to place the blame on anyone and said that I want to finish my PhD and that the amount of supervision I was getting wasn't enough. I was amazed that he took me very seriously; I was appointed 2 co-supervisors and with their guidance I sped my way though. This time last year I was at my wits end with no finish line in sight. Last week, I submitted my PhD :)

My story still may not have a happy ending. I am struggling to find employment and it seems like my main supervisor is retaliating by giving me a bad reference (and he is a very powerful man)....I may have to relocate for my first job to escape his clutches...

At the very least - I feel a small victory to have beat the odds and had enough inner strength to fight through.

I submitted on Monday. I should be happy but I feel awful. I have been looking for work for 3 months and found out today that I failed another interview. I had 3 so far - one postdoc that I really wanted but didn't get and 2 that I could kind of see from the beginning of the interview that I wasn't suited for the job.

I am now eaten away by dread. I am not an outgoing person. I never did network and when I presented at conferences I got minimum exposure. Also, in many ways I didn't put 100% into my PhD.. Half way through, my parents were diagnosed with serious illnesses (one right after the other) - so the second part of my PhD was mostly done at home and with bare minimum of effort to get me over the line. I am not that surprised that I didn't get a postdoc in my department. I have to be honest - from what I showed them, I wouldn't have given myself a postdoc either.

I am under a lot of financial pressure because my parents can't work and I kept promising them that after PhD, I will find a good job and take care of them. I have now failed to deliver. I am very scared - I cry every day.

I went to my department and basically begged for some tutoring/marking work to earn some money. They gave me quite a lot - nearly a full time load so I will be financially OK for the next 3 months (semester). But then what?

I am also unsure of the right strategy. Is it time to start applying for non-research positions? I think I have to. I am now spending my days refreshing job sites. Celebrating submission of my thesis is far from how I feel.

Also this may be silly, but when I go to my university for tutoring stuff, people are constantly asking me if I found a job. Those are my peers that managed to secure post-docs at our (well now my former) department. It makes me feel even more as a failiure and I can tell that they look at me with pity. It's got to the point where I try to just avoid everyone.

I am in possibly the worst place I have been in my life. I regret a lot of things. I regret ever starting PhD, I regret not making more effort in both my PhD and networking aspects. I accept responsibility for my mistakes but it doesn't make my predicament any easier.

Any words of advice? Sorry for rambling.

Do you guys think he sabotaged this on purpose? It's pretty awful to think that he did this so that I can do his teaching/marking for another semester. Or is he just misguided? I guess it doesn't matter. The only good thing is that he was honest in how the conversation went (he could have easily lied to me)...so I sort of know where the problem is.

I don't think that he has a research project lined up or he would mention something. I have a casual teaching gig for the next semester (which helps my supervisor because I teach and mark instead of him).

As for him possibly looking out for me, at this point I would happily embrace a boss from hell to being unemployed. I don't think he has a right to interfere in any case.

I am about 2 weeks away from submitting my PhD. I have started looking for research/postdoc posts in late November. There are very few ads in my area of study. There were only 4 applications I sent and got an interview for one.

After the interview, they seemed very interested and told me that they are about to check my references. I gave them my principal supervisor as a reference. They called him up and literally after that conversation I found out I didn't get the job.

I spoke to my supervisor and he basically said that he wasn't comfortable with that job for me. He questioned the guy on supervisory arrangements and found out that the guy will be away for 6 months in 2014. My supervisor then told him that I need supervision and questioned him further on who would supervise when he is away. He basically presented me as someone that is not able to work independently. I am not surprised that I didn't get the job.

The problem is that my supervisor micromanaged me and gave me a lot of supervision I didn't need. It anything, I much prefer to work more independently.

I am feeling really depressed since there are no new ads to apply to. I feel like my supervisor just screwed up my one chance at getting a postdoc.

I am also worried that if another job appears that he will do the same thing. And let's face it, I can't afford to let another opportunity go. I am thinking of removing my supervisor from the referee list. Will this looks really bad? Should I ask my supervisor not to say anything like that in the future?

Any comments on this would be appreciated. I don't even know if what my supervisor did is realistically bad (he framed it as "looking out for me")...it just feels wrong.

I have had tough time this year. It's my last year of the PhD and my main supervisor has been largely unavailable. He had some personal issues but he also seemed avoidant of supervising me and almost stalling the whole PhD process. He knows how keen I am to submit by the end of the year. Keep in mind that he has been nearly perfect the first 2 years of my candidature. I am his first PhD student.

My second supervisor, who I barely see thinks that I should submit at the end of the year. She is a very experienced academic with tons of PhD students. The problem is that she can't understand 90% of my PhD due to highly specialized mathsy content. So she can't really judge how well my thesis is written. She is just there to offer some general guidance.

I haven't published anything from my PhD yet but I plan 2 papers from it. My main supervisor thinks that I should wait until after I submit to work on them. So no part of my thesis has been examined.

I have written up everything except for my last chapter. All my other chapters have been through 2-3 iterations with my main supervisor.

My second supervisor and me are now pushing my main supervisor to get things into shape for submission in a few months. He is STILL dragging his heels. He is not sure what standard of thesis is "good enough" and keeps saying that if I submit when I plan to, I am taking a gamble.

Of course, I am worried that I will submit and spectacularly fail. I am not sure whose advice to listen to. I am inclined to want to submit sooner, rather than later.

Thoughts?

So I am in my last year. My PhD is part time so it had stretched out over 6 years. It's such a long time. I have 2 supervisors. I had some medical issues and had to take a few months leave of absence couple of times.

I REALLY want to finish this. I am writing up and so close to the end. But both of my supervisors can't be less interested. I have to hassle them for meetings (and they only meet me once a month). Often they would postpone the meeting even further. I know what I need to do, so I don't really need much supervision. They just need to read what I wrote and correct it. They do it in the end but I feel it shouldn't be that hard to make them do their work.

Also, my motivation has been low lately. It just feels depressing that nobody is that interested, making me less interested. I feel like I have to make do with supervisors that I have as finding a new one would be too time consuming.

Is this sort of thing normal? Supervisors kind of losing interest towards the end? And how do I cope? Just keep pushing along and chasing them to read my work?

Sigh :(