Yeah, Biology degrees are pretty much only set up for research, specifically I did zoology, so it's not the most impressive degree wrt job skills, I did want to do research, but I think my motives got confused, I really think that quitting now might be the best option for me, it seems obvious from my gut feelings (I can't sleep, it's all I think about) that I made a mistake in choosing this subject. I think I might go speak to student support right now,

Nah if i had a relevant degree like engineering I wouldn't feel like the job market was unapproachable, I have a degree in biology... So yeah, I haven't really given this the most fair chance, I feel like I'm just wandering around in bewilderment at what to read, and concerned that what I am drawn towards isn't actually what I'm supposed to be reading. I will talk through with my supervisor properly, and I think that maybe I should speak to student support type people too, you said that was really helpful right?

Hey Guitarman, So having read your post, I feel like perhaps it's not all bad, you had so so much to go through, I'm pleased for you it's all worked out in the end. For myself, I've emailed my funding body for advice, and found out that dropping out probably wouldn't affect anyone really that much, but I think perhaps I haven't given it a good enough go. I know my supervisor would be willing to talk about life crisis type problems, I just guess I haven't felt confident to actually say anything, and they're away for the next week. I think that I would be happy treating this like a job, and frankly there's nothing really out there that I want to do, I have a good degree but no managerial/office/team etc experience, but a lot of those kind of jobs frankly sound boring to me, I think I have been pretty rash. It's just when you read about or speak to people who always say that their PhD was the hardest, most gruelling experience, but the love of the subject kept them going, that's where I feel I faulter. But then the terror of the job market scares me too. I'm trying to calm down and write a list of pros and cons...

Hey,

Thanks for that advice, Guitarman, have you started another position? Did you drop out early on? I'm worried that this will completely screw up any chances of me getting onto another PhD position if I wanted to reapply in the future. This is really stressing me out, I can hardly sleep for worrying, so I think that my gut is saying no - but it's hard to make a rational choice with this panic going on in my head.

Hi All,

Thanks for your advice. I'm currently leaning towards the 'if I feel like this now when it's all new and "exciting", when I could change the project now before I start going fully, how am I going to feel when it actually goes bad?' Did anyone really think they might actually drop out before they even start? I've spoken to a few people now and they've all said the love of the project carried them through the hard times.

My supervisor is away at the moment, so I am going to find out about the process of dropping out and try and weigh up the alternatives. A request for more advice to those (ex-funded students) who have dropped out of a PhD - What money did you have to pay back? Like tuition fees and the money you've already received from the funding body/money you've already spent out of the funding?

Thanks

I'm kinda being pathetic with missing friends and my partner, seeing as we're both in the same country and can visit at weekends. From that aspect it's more the feeling that seeing as I've made this daunting commitment and moved away, I should be feeling like it's the best thing in the world.... Which I don't, it's something I find fairly interesting, but it's not like I'm working with an organism I really love. Although to be honest I couldn't specifically say what would be a better choice. Initially I just wanted to know if people do continue with and grow to enjoy their PhD's even if from the outset they can't shake off the feeling they could have made a better decision?

Starshine and Sneaks, what years are you both in? It just seems ridiculous to be thinking about quitting in the first month, like a waste of time on behalf of my supervisor and the funding body, but I really just feel doubtful of my decision. Although saying that I keep looking at jobs/alternate paths and again nothing appeals, at least I know I did love science during my UG. I think part of the reason is that I've moved away from my partner and friends, and so in my mind I keep thinking 'was this really good enough to move away from them', although I looked for PhD positions to stay there and none looked that good. Is there anyone else who is torn between continuing their PhD or just moving back to be with friends/family/partners?

Hi,

I've just started a PhD and even 1 week into it am worried that I've done the wrong thing. I absolutely loved my UG degree, and so taking a PhD position seemed like a logical step, as researching/lecturing appealed to me as a career. I approached my supervisor as I enjoyed the general field his work is in, and was co-supervised by him in my final year project (which my PhD doesn't follow on from). I was worried about applying before, as some of my friends knew for certain that they only cared about one field, but I liked everything on my UG.
However, since starting, I have worried everyday. I felt like the whole process went so fast last year, and I didn't really sit down and thoroughly think about precisely what I'm doing. Now that I'm here, I feel like I've only just caught up and realised that perhaps I'd rather be doing something else within this field, it's more like a 'what if' feeling for every other topic going! Everyone has said that PhD's are hard, and only do it if you love it... That's the problem for me, I know I like the field my research would be in, but I don't honestly think I could say I love it, and now the thought of 3 years terrifies me, and the thought of persuing research after also scares the hell out of me. Basically does this sound like beginner nerves? As character flaws go, I suffer from low self confidence related to my abilities, and am really critical of myself. I thought that a PhD would build up my confidence in myself, - has anyone pursued a PhD that they genuinely didn't think they absolutely loved for the experience of personal development? And are there any other students who are thinking 'what have I let myself in for' so much it's the only thing they can think about??