It is defiantly the hardest decision I have ever had to make and I know I am doing the right thing but it doesn't make it any easier. I get on really well with everyone at the university and my supervisor has been so good to me and I don't want to let them down. However life is too short to be doing something that makes you unhappy, you have to live each day as if it's your last. I know I was very good at my last job and enjoyed working within the industry, although it was much more fast paced than university life!!!! I hope to find a similar role to what I was doing before I started the PhD. The only dilemma I have is that my first year review is in 4 weeks, therefore it looks at though I will probably have to quite before I have a chance to secure a job which worries me. Who knows what the future will hold?

I don't really know what to expect from this post but it has been good to discuss my experience as I haven't really spoken to many people about it. If anyone has any advice/suggestions/similar personal experiences, feedback would be very much appreciated :)

I spoke to my supervisor about the problems I had been having and how I was feeling and she was very understanding. We agreed my first year review should be postponed for 6 months to allow me to get better and that I would remain at the university and work in the lab making sure I didn't push myself too hard. My re-scheduled first year review is now a couple of weeks away and I still don't feel any better and I know I am not going to be ready for it.

I have found the transition from working in industry to going back to university much harder than I had ever anticipated. I was always so passionate and hardworking during my BsC and MsC degrees and I thought I would be during this PhD too but the passion is just not there. I miss just going into work, doing what I am scheduled to do and then coming home and being able to relax at nights and the weekends. The fact that I don't have a set research topic doesn't help either as this makes me even more worried and anxious. I don't know how many times I have been asked to develop analytical methods to help other people in the department which has nothing to do with my PhD. Only last week I was told to abandon my PhD topic for the meantime and develop a method for something more important the department needs to analyse. In addition, nobody in the department knows anything about the instrumentation I am using. I know the basics and some more but not enough to accomplish this PhD on my own.

*Will have to continue in a new message

Hi guys

I have posted some threads on this site previously regarding my PhD and the doubts and difficulties I have been having/facing. After many months of consideration I am almost 100% sure this is not for me and I have to quit for my own happiness and health.

I started my PhD almost 18 months ago within the field of science. I previously worked within industry for over 2 years and the PhD offer came out of blue after I had an interview for a job at the university I am at. At the time I wasn't sure if a PhD was for me or not but in the end I decided it was too good an opportunity to turn down and I looked forward to starting something new which would challenge and excite me. In hind sight, the fact I didn't seek the PhD out myself was perhaps a sign I didn't actually want to do it.

The first 9 months or so were really enjoyable as I started to familiarise myself with the analytical instrumentation I was going to use during my research and I began to learn about my research topic which was totally new to me. However, as time went on I began to get anxious and depressed on a daily basis. I found myself sitting at my desk all day doing nothing and then feeling guilty all the time for not doing any work. It was like vicious cycle. I can't explain why I had no motivation, it was if I has nothing else to give. I went to the university counsellor several times to discuss my feelings and then eventually the doctor who put me on anti-depressants and gave me tablets for my anxiousness.

*Will have to continue in a new message

Hi nathaliePhD, thank your for the reply. I shall try all your tips and see how I get on :-) I think this will be my make or break week so going to just give it 110% and see how I get on. I don't work very well at Uni and never have when writing reports etc so going to try it in the comfort of my own home. Just have to try and stay positive :) Thanks again

Hi guys

I have posted previously on this forum regarding my uncertainty of whether or not I want to continue with my PhD. I have been feeling really down lately and was recently diagnosed with depression. I have not been productive at all but really am trying to give it my all. I have my 1 year review in just over 5 weeks time and I dont think I am going to be ready for it, both report wise but also mentally. Today I wrote about 50 words :( I love being in the lab working away but when it comes to sitting down and writing reports etc I just cant seem to get the words out and I hate it. Everyday I feel worse as I make no progress and dread getting up in the morning.

I worked in industry for 2 years prior to starting my PhD and although it was v stressful I actually miss the way of working. I always felt like I had accomplished something and worked really hard everyday but doing this PhD I feel useless and angry because I am not getting anywhere. I am finding the transition very difficult. Has anyone been in a similar situation?

Thanks :)

Hi Bacha, thanks for the reply. I wouldn't even consider doing a PhD while working full time as I can hardly cope at the moment with the PhD alone. I really don't know if I am committed to the PhD and that is the main problem. If I'm being honest I can't imagine doing this for th next 2 years and being anxious 7 days a week 24/7. I think if I'm being totally honest I want to leave but there is that worry I am rushing into it and the guilt towards my supervisor and the university. I have a lot to think about over the next few days......

Hi guys

I am about 9 months into my PhD and have recently been having major doubts over whether I actually want to do it anymore. I am finding the theory behind my topic really difficult to understand and have been both anxious and depressed over the last couple of weeks. Im jusy not coping. Before starting my PhD I worked in industry for 2 years and have found the transition to studying again very difficult. When I started thinking I couldn't go on with this PhD I applied for a few jobs in the panic that if I did decide to leave I wouldnt have an income to pay for my living expenses!!! I have recieved an email today inviting me to an interview for one of the jobs I applied for and now don't know what to do. It's a job within the science industry close to where I live and in the area I worked in before starting the PhD

I don't know what to do. I don't know if I'm rushing into this too soon and feel really guilty going behind my supervisors back. She has been away for about 4 weeks so I haven't spoken to her about my doubts and feelings regarding the PhD. I am also worried because on my Cv I didn't specify I am currently doing a PhD and put it down as 'further research'. If I do go to the interview should I clarify this beforehand?

Has anyone been in a similar situation before? Do people think what I am doing is morally wrong? I'm so confused!!!'

Thanks

Hi Thumbelina

Thank you for the reply - it is very much appreciated :)

I made an appointment today to speak to the counsellor at university so I can discuss my problems and hopefully clarify the situation in my head. At the moment it is just such a struggle to get out of bed in the mornings knowing I'm going into something I'm not enjoying and don't understand. I then get frustrated and upset when I eventually sit down to do the work as I spend so much time trying to make sense of it all but get no where and end up feeling worse - it's a vicious circle!!!

I shall let you know how I get on.

Thanks Again

Hi guys

I havent posted any threads on here since July of last year when I was initially offered my PhD. Although things were great for the first 6 months + I really enjoyed my research, I am now really struggling + depressed + I am wondering whether or not this PhD is for me.

One of the main problems is my anxiouness, which I feel everyday while at university + then at night time when I go home. I am always worrying about whether or not I am doing enough work + how I am progressing. It is making me a nervous wreck + I feel it will only get worse as the PhD progresses. My PhD is within the field of science + I am also finding it extremely hard to complete my laboratory work but also do research. Although I have experience in the analytical techniques I am using, the theories are all new to me + I just cant get my head around them + I dont think I ever will - it just doesnt interest me!!!

Prior to starting the PhD I worked for 2 years within industry + I now feel this is where I am probably best suited. My main reason for doing the PhD was to gain experience within a different sector of the scientific industry + learn new skills. However I find the research aspect really difficult and the thought of doing this when I graduate makes me feel depressed. So I have to ask the question - if I dont want to do reasearch is a PhD for me?

I have always been very hard working + having previously done a BSc and MSc thought I was prepared for the PhD but maybe I was wrong.

If I did decide to leave the PhD programme I have the worry of what I would do afterwards? I have rent and bills etc to pay + cant afford to not have an income of some sort. I also dont want to let my supervisor + university department down who have been very supportive + paid my tuition fees + my monthly stipend.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thank You

Hi keenbean, thank you for your reply. Congratulations on getting your PhD :-) It's good to hear a positive story and I understand that most people probably come on here for support when they are feeling down or want advice. I am hoping mine will mostly be a positive experience :-)

My field is in science (I have a BSc in Forensic Science and an MSc in Toxicology). For my PhD I will be specialising in oilfield analysis. I don't have very much experience within this field but have a fair bit of experience in the scientific techniques I will be using. I have been working in the pharmaceutical industry for the last two years since graduating so am a bit apprehensive about going back to university. I am excited too though :-). What about u?

I am also a perfectionist!!!! I am more than willing to put the hard work in to complete the PhD but also want to be able to have a social life, be able to spent time with my partner and not come away from it with health complications!!!! I suppose every situation is different :-)

Hi all

I am just about to start a PhD in the next couple of months and am both excited and apprehensive. However, a number of threads on here discuss the negative aspects of a PhD which really worries me!!!! I understand it isn't going to be plain sailing all the time and am willing to put the time and effort in but dont want to have a nervous breakdown!!! I guess I was wondering if anyone would like to discuss the positive aspects of their PhD or any positive stories anyone may have? :-)

Thank you for the advice :-) I hate being so quiet and shy but I am not going to let it effect my choices in life or hold me back. I have decided to accept the PhD offer and hopefully during it I will be able to improve my confidence, presentation and communication skills :-)

Thank you everyone for your feedback and advice. I have decided to go for the PhD - I am scared and apprehensive but I think this is a fantastic opportunity which will really improve my skills and knowledge and challenge me. :-)