======= Date Modified 19 Dec 2011 22:05:22 =======
This is more common than you think - and every person I know who it has happened to got their PhD in the end. I'm sure you will be fine.

Small thing, though, I have the Manchester criteria right here in front of me on my examiners' report, and Aii is 'award subject to minor corrections being made to the satisfaction of the internal examiner' (within a month); Bi is commonly referred to as major corrections and officially is 'permitting submission of a revised thesis for examination without further research and without further oral examination'. Aii is minor not major.

Had the viva for my PhD in History on 30th June and passed with minor corrections! The viva lasted about two hours and was intense but actually a joy in many ways.

No advice, as I'm feeling it too - 30 next year, been doing this part-time for six years, even supposedly in the last few weeks of writing it doesn't feel like it will ever end. While my friends are married, have their own home, proper jobs, families. I don't even know if I want all of those things, yet not having them makes me feel like a child! Anyway, I suppose what gets me through is thinking that if I don't give up, I'll at least have salvaged something out of the last few years, rather than starting all over again at this age without anything to show for it.

Hope things feel better for you soon.

======= Date Modified 12 Sep 2010 18:54:26 =======
Edit to say that you replied while I was posting: glad you're feeling a bit better!

I used to be physically sick before presentations and still get very very nervous, so know how you feel a bit. I would also say that you need to cut yourself some slack. This isn't the only presentation you've done, is it, and you've done fine those other times? Maybe you were putting more pressure on yourself as it was your first post-PhD and, in combination with tiredness, it led to you having a bad day. We've all had them. I've even given the exact same paper on different days and had it tank one day and go brilliantly another! Sometimes it's all about state of mind.

I went to a voice-projection workshop led by someone from drama and it was really helpful. That was for PhD students but maybe it would be worth digging around to see if they offer similar for post-docs and/or lecturers. My supervisor also had me shout stuff to him at the other end of the corridor to check my projection before I gave my first lecture, but I wouldn't recommend that if you don't want your colleagues to think you are crazy! I have also asked fellow students to give me (honest) feedback on my delivery and that has been helpful - but make sure it is someone you can rely on to give you *constructive* criticism. Anyway, for today, you have permission to mope (have you got any chocolate?) but make sure that you get right back on that horse.

Both of my supervisors have been superb. One of them, in particular, has had so much on his plate (he's an associate dean of the faculty) but has always had much, much more time for me than I am entitled to on paper (I'm a part-time student). He has given me the key to his office to use this summer as I am in the last month of the thesis. Once, when we were applying for funding AGAIN and I apologised for having to do this once more, he sent me an e-mail that just said 'Don't worry. You are worth it.' He is great.

My other supervisor is the type that thinks (he actually has told me this) that your biggest critic is your best friend. He is no nonsense. He covers the page in corrections and deals in comments like 'yuck', 'help me I'm lost' etc. He challenges me a lot. At first, I found this very difficult and was defensive. Now I know that his supervision has made a massive difference to my own ability to deal with criticism (good prep for the viva!) and has made the thesis so much better. On my last draft of my last chapter he wrote on the top of the page 'This is astonishingly well-written in terms of its clarity. It reads like published text not a draft!' I cried. He will retire the day I submit my thesis. I feel so lucky to have been the last of his students.

======= Date Modified 31 Jul 2010 12:45:48 =======
Ha ha, make that two people who have clocked who you are in real life. ;-) Unless I have told you before and I have forgotten - a distinct possibility. Don't worry, I won't blow your cover if you don't blow mine, but let's just say that I am a modern historian who may have edited a special issue of a journal last year with some great little articles in it ... *Whistles nonchalantly; tries not to draw too much attention to herself.*

Anyway, I need luck, definitely, but congrats DR Chrisrolinski! I hope it has started to sink in and see you around. :-)

Congrats, Chris! This is so inspiring to read as I am struggling today (just over two weeks until I am to have my final draft to supervisors) and just want to curl up into a ball and SLEEP! Your last few weeks have given me hope that I can get this done and get through the viva. I remember from years back that we are at the same institution - I have a sneaky feeling that we may even have met (not a stalker, promise!) - so if you see someone around that has massive bags under their eyes and a vacant look in their eyes, able to think only of the thesis, it's probably me!

I am told that it is a proper anti-climax after the viva, but at least IT IS DONE! Woo hoo!

Ask your supervisor. Mine has told me to only include works that are actually cited at some point in the thesis itself. This is why you get those big footnotes with a string of references in them sometimes; so you can stick it all in the bibliography to look impressive!

Historian weighing in to agree with jepsonclough. In the intro, explicit signposting is needed, so say 'In Chapter One, supervisory issues with introductions are explored to provide a context...'

I'm writing my intro now and finding it hard too. My supervisor told me that it will feel clunky and awkward because it has to. It is not the place for elegant style, but has to be very matter of fact. This is hard for us arty-farty types, I think! Good luck.

Goal 1: Write general plan for introduction.
Goal 2: Write massively scary e-mail to famous historian, asking if she will be a referee (she once said casually that she would be happy to write references for me, but the reality of actually asking is hard!)

I seem to have a policy of writing a scary e-mail a day at the moment. If you don't ask, you don't get, but still makes me feel a bit vulnerable.

Good stuff, Chrisrolinski! We'll all be cheering you on. And thank heavens for good supervisors. I'm giving them stuff tomorrow (I'm hoping to submit in September) and I already know that there will be LOTS of criticism, because that's how they roll, but they always make the work so much better.

Go go go! (up)

I know the feeling. I just saw a job advertised that I've probably got no chance for but was the first one in ages where I thought 'I could actually do that and I'd like to work there too!'

However, my last job app took me ages and things are so busy with the thesis that I don't know if I've got the energy. I'm not sure if I have the sticking power (and sheer bloody-mindedness) needed for the academic job search!

I had a similar job come up recently... I didn't get it, but I don't regret applying. I think I was a strong candidate and if I had finished my PhD, I would have had more of a shot. It was a great experience to think about the skills I have and how to market them, etc. Go for it - you never know! And the way I saw it was that I had nothing to lose. You don't want to be stuck thinking 'what if...?'

Goal 1 and Goal 3 done. Goal 2 will probably take up most of the afternoon. Will vote when my boyfriend gets home from work, we like to do it together - a bit of a ritual!

My favourite quote on this type of thing is: 'There's no such thing as a career path. It's crazy paving and you have to lay it yourself'.

I heard this at a workshop on academic careers, and it has stuck with me ever since!